Age, Ages, and Aging

I was 12 and happy

But then it happened

I fell too quickly.

 

I was 13 and it was hard

Scars upon scars

Words like shards

That cuts through my heart.

 

I was 14 and so scared

What to do with my life

Do I dare?

I started not to care.

 

I was 15 and so nervous

Wondering why I’m not worth it

All this pressure to be perfect

I really don’t deserve this.

 

I was 16 and so confused

My heart was so bruised

Nothing about me improved

All these scars, what does it prove?

 

I’m 17 and so lost

My mind is aloft

My emotions are off.

 

I’m 18 and numb

Emotions hitting me all at once

The struggles I’m facing

Do I even want to give up?

 

I’m 19 and open

My mind constantly wandering

Life is being experienced

The thrill was intangible.

 

I was 20 and trapped

They say that

I have my mother’s smile

And my father’s eyes

But I truly hope

I don’t have their curse

Of continued sadness.

 

I am present.

Soaking in the daily rhythms

The stimulation of frenzied signing

Has me feigning for the future.

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